they're ex-unicorns, right?

PIZZA SHAME SPIRAL

To the tune of “Careless Whisper:”

I’m never gonna eat pizza again
this guilty belly is full of pizza
and though it’s easier to pretend
I ate too much pizza 3 a.m.
and now I want to dieeeeeee

And also: Pythagorean Theorem

• me: So I'm going to write up today as National Pie Day but let's def. do the other National Pi Day on 3.14
• winona.rose: YES my hipster friends and I celebrate that one with pizza, pie, and math charades
• me: MATH CHARADES!
• winona.rose: yes, it's the best! my favorites were Schrodinger's Cat and "Show Your Work"

Perving.

• Amelia: I just had a shameful moment at Subway. I found myself lusting after the high school skater boy ahead of me in line.
• Julie: Why is that shameful? That's every day of my life.
• Amelia: He was, like, 16.
• Julie: Should i feel shame for that? I'm sorry.

That Guy Died? I LOVED HIM IN THAT THING!

@BoobsRadley and I are big fans of THIS GUY’S work. Because you know when you’re watching WALKER, TEXAS RANGER and you’re like, I wonder what anonymous range hand thug did before he was in this! He’s so talented:

• Slomins Shield Commercial, HOME INVADER NUMBER ONE
  
• Homophobic Salad Bar Customer #2, “Designing Women” 
  
• Roadhouse bar customer/drifer “ROADHOUSE” (nonspeaking role)
  
• Husband who spills beef gravy on self, SHOUT! commercial
  
• Sharecropper/Dustbowl Shandy, traveling company of “OF MICE AND MEN”
  
• Trucker Eating Pie who Gets Decapitated By a Crossbow, “From Dusk Til Dawn 3” (Straight to video)
  
•  Helicopter Pilot Who Is Gunned Down in Drug Trafficking incident gone awry, “MIAMI VICE”
  
• Klansman with a Limp, Hallmark Channel Special about an Interracial Family That Adopts A Fire House Dog
  
• Abusive Husband Who Is Killed Off Early On In LMN movie About A Woman Who Has a Psychotic Break and Becomes a Black Widow.
  
•  Short Order Cook, Al Pacino’s Nephew’s Gritty Brooklyn Crime Drama, Financed By Al Pacino, Official Selection: Sacramento Film Festival
  
• Loveable Neighborhood Retard Abused by Gang of Bullies Led By Skeet Ulrich, in an Indie Film Produced by Skeet Ulrich’s Cougar Girlfriend, Straight to Video
  
•  Cabbie Into Whose Cab a Flustered Matthew McConaughey Jumps, Shouting “Follow that weddin’ limo!” Who Replies, “You gotta be kiddin’ me!”, Untitled Matthew McConaughey Kate Hudson Project (2013)

• nicole: i have graduated in my dating life to the "why hasn't he texted me back" stage, btw. It's great!
• me: omg, i live there. i will build you a cottage on the back of my houseboat